If you won a million dollars what would you do with it?

go for a world tour :)

go on, dont be shy :DD

What was your worst travel experience?

my wallet was magically lost ><

go on, dont be shy :DD

What music are you listening to today?

You and I tonight :)

go on, dont be shy :DD

formspring.me

go on, dont be shy :DD http://formspring.me/macymacymacy

            I can't stand it.

            That's it. I said it already. I CAN'T STAND IT. I freaking abhor stereotyping. We usually think of it as a usual part of our day to day routine. We often do this. With or without conscious. It somehow runs in our minds that stereotyping is normal. That's what most of us think. That's what most of us believe. But I think reverse.

            Who would wanna be called nerds and freaks and geeks? Who would wanna be called as high-hats and socialites and cheap mongrels and skyrunner freaks? Who would wanna be called coal blacks? Who wanna be called names out of foolishness, stereotypes or worse- discrimination?

            It can't be denied that there is a major discrepancy between all of us. We are all unique right? But what's with the stereotyping and judgmental-ISM? Stereotyping is getting into my nerves and I just can't let it slip my way. It's only masking peoples' true  identities thus hiding their true personalities from the whole world.  Stereotyping is not a simple problem. It's not just a laughing stock or whatever. It's something to think about. What if this will get into you and put you in great misery? would you let that happen? Think about it.

          I'd like to end this with this simple words from Johny Depp- "I am a weirdo. All of us are weirdos in our own special ways." So don't you ever... JUDGE :))))

Nostalgia: real killer.

It’s funny how we rush things and want them to change in our own wills. And when everything else has changed already, we’d suddenly want them to get back to where they really belong. We’d wish so hard we could turn back time. What an irony.

            

                The fun-filled days jam-packed with happy nostalgia. They seem so endless. I had so much fun even at the beginning. I have to admit that. I had real friends. I can’t even deny the fact that I have already grew attached to that place. But something (I thought) was still not right. Something was still lacking. I was still on search. On search of something neither do I know.  Right then and there, I thought leaving was the best idea. I was in a search for greener pastures. I had a rush decision I have to admit that. And so, I have to leave the one place that I was dreaming to live… I never realized I so love the place until I left. I never realized the essence of being there. I never realized I just have to think harder. I never realized.

              

                Now all I have are memories. Hard and soft. I keep weeping. I thought I’d be happier if I’d leave. But no. I wasn’t. I was never. I was begging for one more chance. But life wasn’t that easy. You have to stand up for what you’ve decided. You have to deal with it unit it deals with you already. You have to live what you decided. PERIOD.

                Regrets are relentless. They are haunting. My mind had experienced a great battle. But I was too insubstantial for that. I became a one-day hero. ONE day only. After that? I was a crap. I was useless already. What my mind has made up was also rubbish. I keep cursing myself. But what can I still do? I am already far far away from my home away from home. I have lost so many things. I have lost so many people. I have lost so many chances and opportunities life had to offer. I know I have a lesson to determine here. But I don’t wanna think about it anymore. Now I’m bitter L

that moment..

     I didnt quite get the feeling. I was like experiencing heaven in a very very hot ambiance. I was stooping down low. Heavy breaths filled me up. I didnt know what to do. I was reaching the climax of my happiness and I was still thinking about how I am gonna react and so on. What's gonna be the first thing Im gonna do? What???? I am filled with confusions only I know the answer. 

    Argh!!! I dont know how I feel right now so I dont know what to write. I DONT KNOW. I am running out of words so lets put it this way:

    I am partly excited, partly nervous, partly confused, partly lost. Whatever that is, I am happy, or so, i think. i and kuya were waiting down the escalator. there was a thrill there. We could first see the feet of the passenger and they would slowy be revealed as the escalator goes down. I was nervous. You know the feeling of waiting and anxious about how youre gonna act towards your dad whom you didnt see for almost 2 years???? It was some sort of a thrill and excitement. I was staring keenly to the feet, an pants and the persons revealed. Where's dad now?

    Thrilled as I was, my excitement was rising dramatically making my heart pound a million times faster. Darn. A feet caught my attention. As he was slowly revealed, i knew it was dad. I just stared intently. I was quite astounded, flabbergasted. Woah! He waved excitedly! Know what I did? I ran as fast as I could towards him not caring about the people around and as I reached him, I huuuuuuuuuuggggged hinm soooooooooooooooooo tight! I didnt quite realized my tears were filling up my warm cold cheeks. I was so flabbergasted. Dad. I miss you so much, I thought I was gonna abhor you forever. No. I realized how much I missed him and I love him so much. He is darn so irreplaceable. I was flattered so much when he enveloped us with his warm hug and he was crying too. Tears of joy. Happy? Litote! Haha. I am more than happy and I am sure with that. :)))

    I really dont know what to say now---- still amazed and I am still trying to let dad's arrival sink into my mind. Its as if i am still dreaming with butterflies in my stomach and fireflies on my head. LOL. Next time napud. bonding sa miiii :)))) 

with all the love in the world,

<3MacyPiaoLiang :))))))))))) 

This is how i disappear :(

I thought I’d be stronger this time. But no I wasn’t. I was worse.


Yesterday was heaven. Now it’s hell. Irony is- I’m not feeling its burning fires. It’s way too cold. Way too silent. Way too sorrowful. I don’t know what to do. I’m dumped in a cold hell.

I know, I have to get used to being here in the silent abyss of deafening screams of anguishes and cries of pathetic hopes and illusions. I have to understand and embrace the understanding that the magic you once knew and felt wouldn’t last long in your eyes. But I should always think it’s gonna stay for the rest of my life in my heart if I wouldn’t let it slip away.

When he left, it was like the whole world died with me. I couldn’t stop crying and worse, I can’t live a life. I suddenly got used to waking up in the morning hearing his bubbly voice chatting with mom and grandma outside. I would hurriedly get up from bed and hurry to the kitchen and then run to him to get a morning comfort. He would envelope me with his warm embrace and right then and there, I’d feel so contented. And when its siesta time, I would fall asleep on his soft lap and wake up seeing his eyes glued to me. Darn. He would put up a smile, caress my face and whisper I love you. And I wouldn’t think it’s a mirage at all, it was happening right before me.

He was with me during the first five days of my 18th year of existence. I got used to the idea of having him beside me always. I wouldn’t feel bad for he was always right there. He was the greatest substitute dad ever. My boyfriend served as my brother, my confidante, my dad, my adviser, best friend, caretaker, daily reminder, inspiration- darn. HE’S EVERYTHING. He can be anything for me. And I can’t help falling in love with him deeper every second of my life. Darn. Am I really this worse?

We are one of the thousands who experience long distance relationships. It’s killing me. We seldom see each other that’s why we’d savor every moment spent together. I thought I’d get used to this routine- Be with him, experience happiness, see him pack, watch him leave. I thought it would only hurt in the beginning. But as I have noticed, it had gone worse.

When he left yesterday, it was as if the world had ended. It was as if the world stopped breathing, lost its colors and it was as if I was torn into millions of pieces and I can never be brought back again. I never learned to master this situation. Darn. Why can’t I? It tears me up knowing his departure time. It tears me more seeing him pack. And it kills me seeing him leave with his bus. I can’t help but pour down all the pain left within me. I can’t help it. Darn. Darn. DARN.

Now I am still suffering. When I got home from the terminal, I suddenly wished and hoped against hope that I would see him when I enter the living room. I closed my eyes, wished, opened the door- and then tears. HE WASN’T THERE ANYMORE. I tried to look for him at the kitchen, he wasn’t there. I tried to keep quiet, listen and wait ‘til his bubbly voice would float back in mid air. It never sounded like before. The silence is deafening. I listened harder. But no voice would ever fill the air except my sniffs. I whispered a shaky “I love you mahal kuu” in the air but there was no answer. The silence got more painful. It was then that I realized he had gone home already. I felt my heart melted in pain and my body grew weak.

I lied down to where he slept awhile ago and tried to smell the scents he left. Darn. It was there. It made me cry and desire for his presence more. I badly wanna see him again. I can’t help but hug the pillow he left and get covered by his blanket. Still, it was insufficient to relieve my sadness. It just made me wanna see him more. I cried so hard but he’s travelled too far now, he won’t hear me anymore. No matter how hard I cry, he can’t just see me anymore. And I can’t help being bitter. Then I fell asleep.

When I woke up, I closed my eyes and wished it was just a dream. I tried to touch the other side of the bed without looking at it, it was flat, I had no one to touch to. My heart sank. It made me sadder. God. Help me. I didn’t wanna get up because I don’t wanna see the empty chairs of the kitchen. I didn’t wanna get up because I had no one to talk to. I don’t wanna move. He wasn’t there anymore. I didn’t know what to do. I didn’t know where to start. Until now, I am still crying like crazy. I don’t know when am I gonna get over it and accept we’ll see each other soon. But how long is soon? We’re million miles from each other. Tell me, how long is soon? :(

i have a GOD :)

            I never wanted to turn my back to the one I know who loves me the most. And it's so stupid of me to forget him almost everytime. worse, every happy momentum in my life. Now that's not fair.

           If it wouldn't be for him, I wouldn't get even a taste of the sweet chills of happiness. I wouldn't get to feel the soothing and comforting love around me. I wouldn't be able to see the beauty and splendor of life. For simplicity's sake, let's put it this way; If not for him, I wouldn't be here. Period.

           Imagine this. You're so desperate to acquire something, you just have to have that and you trade all things in the world just for it. You pray so hard from dawn to dusk and do extra rituals all night long, you ask for divine interventions, you do novenas and all sorts of stuff calling His name for divine providence. You call all the names of the saints, you kneel from the door of the church to its altars. You just won't move without calling his name. And when you magically get what you've been dying to ask, you forget Him. Did it ever happen to you?

           It would be so hypocrite of me if I say no. It's not surprising anymore, I have done it so many times, I have lost count of it already. I have come to realize how stupid I am to forget the one entity I  have been troubling with my urges. That was drop-dead stupid of me. I have been so stupid. Darn. I hate myself for it. It's like this, I can already sleep at night because finally, I am provided. But there is something bothering me and makes me wanna rise again. That's conscience I think. Or whatever you wanna call it okay. I tend to never mind that something and let it slip away. I can remember. But I act as if I can't remember at all. Silly. No. Silly is a litote, silly! 

        I have always wanted to change. I have always wanted for the world to change. I wanna live a life alright? It's just that, I am so human. But I have always had a hope. Human is never far from humane, so I always get the chance. I am gonna make the world proud. How?

      Change. Walk straight. Acknowledge God, always.

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le miserab. haha :)

Summer’s not all fun. How could it be when you just sit all day long on your couch and do nothing- penniless?

                It’s a big piece of irony when you say summer is the best time for all school buddies out there.  Let’s say, well alright half of it constitutes a point. But you can’t hide the truth that when you don’t go to school, you receive no allowance and when you receive no allowance, you suck. You can’t do anything; you get stuck in your lonesome and boring house- well unless your den’s got it all.

                I wonder how I could miss even my stupidest classmate and my most terrifying professor. It’s not strange anymore though. I can’t help but to reminisce all the crazy schemes inside the school with ‘em. I think I just get this ‘really miserable’ when I am left with nothing to do. I would wish school to open as soon as possible but never mind the school burdens and loads. Darn.

                Just this afternoon, I found myself super jaded. I have finished reading all the books left in my mini library, dusty or not. I have watched all the movies I could. I have surfed the net from dawn to daybreak. Darn. I am really humdrum-stricken. I have even deciphered my mom’s antique books and read it cover to cover because of boredom. Our travel’s not until next week. I am really really bored to death. If you’ll tell me to hang-out with my friends- where? My summer’s RAINING CATS AND DOGS. DARN. DARN.

                Let’s wait until next week. I’m going to decrypt a new out of the ordinary things (for me) to fill this summer. I’m gonna get rid of this boredom. You’ll see J

Mindanao Open Skimboarding Competition: a fish to kill :))

-before the incident-

This afternoon, I and my friends almost lost our lives.

                4^th of April was a big event for Mati’s very own, Dahican Beach Resort. The 1^st Mindanao Open Skimboarding Competition paved its way here. Together with the big event came “big” people. Foreigners, politicians, popular skimboarders, media and many others made their appearances, and of course, the excited people of Mati. There were also audiences who travelled all the way from England, Manila- well, I didn’t really surveyed on that. Let’s just put it this way; there was a really huge number of people.

                The sun was burning hot. The sea waves were monsterish. Dahican was a one-hot place to be. It was a picturesque of Boracay. No matter how big and threatening the waves are, the sea was still so oh-so tempting. I and my friends decided to bathe in the sea after the competition. We were brave enough to decide to bathe there since were already used to the feeling of being excruciated by the sea. If you know what I mean. J The waves would swallow you down and throb you so hard that you’ll reach the point of hoping you can get out of it ALIVE.

                We didn’t expect it was also gonna be a big day for us. When the competitions took its lunch break, we decided to invade the sea. We took off our shirts and bravely greet the giant waves. We were just enjoying ourselves when I noticed it wasn’t normal anymore. The waves were getting gigantic and more powerful. My strength dropped down and I could hardly breathe already. One of my friends started to scream for help, she was already being drowned. I called out for my younger sister, Yna and cousin, Jill and told them to return to the seashore. The waves are starting to kill us already.

                Just as I was about to stand up and return to the safe place, a big wave hit us and swallowed me down. Fortunately, Yna, Jill and my friend’s sister, Kakai, were already brought to the seashore.  Leaving Bdick, Kim, Kim’s boyfriend and I drowning and excruciated by the murdering waves. The waves brought Bdick so far from the seashore already, and she can’t swim. Kim’s sister, Dimple, swam after her and tried to save her. Kim’s boyfriend, Xander, was also trying to save Kim. I was alone. I thought it was gonna be the end. I couldn’t find my way out anymore. The waves were continually swallowing me down.

                Kakai started shouting for help and the coastguard came rapidly with life savers. I was already hopeless. I was thinking of giving up. My body was seriously hurting so much and I couldn’t find any strength from it anymore. It was difficult for the coastguards to save us since the waves are really so enormous it would also kill them. Finally, a coastguard grabbed me and helped me stand up. He just told me to swim back to the seashore and left to rescue my still, drowning friends. I was annoyed because I have no strength left and he wants me to swim?! What the hell?! But it was beginning to be alright anyway. With all the scanty vigor left in me, I stood up.

                But the waves are just so teasing. As I stood up, another monsterish wave hit me and unfortunately, swallowed me down again. I lost all the hope left in me. I called out for divine interventions. I was preparing to see the light, until.. Someone from behind grabbed me and took me to the shore in the quickest time possible. I embraced him without even knowing who he was. As I looked up, it was my ex. I couldn’t utter a word. I couldn’t move. I was shaking so hard. I was in a state of shock. I was traumatized. Ghaddamit. After I was saved, Kim and Bdick followed. We were like children who got so lost in the middle of the sea of crowd. We were still gasping. It took me half an hour to move. What annoyed us most was that, the people were starting to crowd us. Flashes from cameras thundered from here to there. Was it there first time to witness such incident?!

                We pulled out ourselves from the scenery. But the f*cking cameras were still following us up to the place where we have to go. They won’t just leave us alone. Thank goodness we were able to lose them. We were already having our rest until minutes after, the ambulance went ringing again. Another batch of kids were drowned in the water and were rescued. Hours after, 4 boys were rescued again, including my ex who was also trying to save his friend.

Now tell me. Was it the hot skimboarders who highlighted the event or- our murdering sea? :P               

Carpe Diem

                Attack life. It’s going to kill you anyway.

                Why fear when you can’t fear at all? What’s the point of hiding away from the reality when you can control it all by yourself anyway? Seize the day.

                I would have to accept what there is to accept for me but of course not just deal with it. If I have to do something about it, I would. Strike while the iron is hot, strike while the iron is cold too. It doesn’t matter anyway. Life doesn’t need too much seriousness. You can’t spoil all your life by becoming oh-so serious! No one gets out of it alive anyway. Add colors and spice up your lifestyle. Do what you have to do.

                Try new stuffs while I still can. I’ll never know. Life is predictably unpredictable. Tell stories, convey emotions, do actions, take parts. I will never know what’s going to happen next but wouldn’t it be a much-better-thing to consider if you are prepared? Isn’t it cool-ER?? I’d take every chance that’d greet my way. Opportunities doesn’t knock only once if you have a backdoor, so I will make myself always open to chances if I missed one. It wouldn’t be the end of the world anyway.

                Never be afraid. All of us possess our own special purposes; I don’t have to compare myself to others. I wouldn’t believe that there’s a point in competing with them. I am unique; I wouldn’t need insecurities to hamper my way. I’d be me. No ifs, ands or buts about. I’d spend my life doing what my heart tells me to. But I will always consider others’ feelings. I know regrets are inevitable, they’re resentful right. But I know I can always do something about it.

                I’d love as if I’ve never been hurt. I’d care as if I master medicine. I’d reach out as if I have extendable arms. I’d give as if I have everything. I’d dance as if I’ll never dance again. I’d sing to the top of my lungs. I’d make them know about my God. I’d take education like it’s the only treasure in the world. I’d protect as if I’m Joan of Arc. I’d live as if there’s no tomorrow. I’d take every chance. Life is short. Don’t make it shortened. But that doesn’t mean we have to rush. Cherish every moment, seize every opportunity.

                Lastly,   I wouldn’t count seconds. I’d make every second count. :)

PBB Teen Clash of 2010 Auditions: a clash of teen spirits

                       Over 5,000 dreams were waiting- hoping. Under the murdering heat of the sun, outside SM City Davao, thousands of teenagers all over the Davao Region have been waiting anxiously for their turns in the audition. Over 5,000 teens gathered only with one aim- to be one of the "housemates" in the reality show in ABS-CBN, The Pinoy Big Brother Teen Edition 2010. Admittedly, I was one of the thousands of youth who stood up there and endured the what seemed to be a "kilometer-long line" for almost 3 hours. Well, I stood up for this motivation, "Charge to experience". Promise! It was really a "what-the-hell thing". 

                        Who would like to be squeezed so hard in the middle of the huge crowd anyway? If it wasn't for my company- Ms. Jessa June Uyan, I would have gone straight home right from the start. Upon seeing the amazingly huge crowd, I was undeniably motivated. Yes. Motivated. It was really fun gazing at the other teens’ faces, there are some who wore really thick make ups and heavy outfits. But their postures seemed to melt with the burning sun. Haha. :)) I was only wearing a pants, shirts and sneakers. So Probinsyana. 

                        What added to the fun was that, we were able to gain "instant friends". Yeah. We weren't the only youth travelers. There were also some who traveled all the way from Cagayan, Bukidnon and Cotabato. Wow. They were determined. All eyes on the prize. Great. I wasn't even thinking of getting into the list. Again, it was only a ''charge to experience thing''. They were really brave-warriors.

                        We were like standing under the heat of the sun for more than 3 hours but the line would only move an inch per 30 minutes. I was already confused of what to feel and how to act. I was like dying out of boredom and my knees were already shaking out of exhaustion. But it wasn’t until the security guard opened the path to the proper line. I hurriedly grabbed Jessa with me and we ran with the excited teens straight to the line.

                        It was really thrilling and exciting. We found ourselves finally falling in the real lineup. The people around us were pushing so hard that we were already pressed tightly and I can hardly breathe. But I still found it really exciting. I wasn’t annoyed or what. I was still laughing so hard in the inside.

                        Jessa’s face couldn’t be drawn already. Mine too of course. Imagine the crowd! What grabbed my attention was that there was this young man who was still surfing the net with his iPhone despite the hard scenery. There was also this guy who was complaining about the people who kept breaking the line. He was a tough one. The two of them, Jessa and I became friends. Let’s say, Instant best friends. Kuya Kevin, Kuya Jimwell and Jessa served as my source of strength.

                        We barely knew each other but we were really determined not to stay away from each other. Whatever happens, we should always be intact. It was so fun because we seemed to like know each other for how many years now. We served as each other’s support system.

                        The crowd grew impatient and mad. They started pushing really hard that there was already a semi-stampede happening. The security guards couldn’t block the mad teens anymore. Are the teens from Mindanao this desperate already? I don’t know. I was starting to lose oxygen- but it was still fun.

                        The auditions finally started. Our waiting time for our turns in the auditions seemed to be the greatest irony of our audition time. The audition lasted for just approximately 3 minutes and if they don’t like you, never mind the torments you’ve just undergone awhile ago. You just have to go straight home.

                        A few rejoiced but thousands more were frustrated and disappointed. I and my instant friends didn’t make it. But it was still fun. Hell yeah. We were still intact. We were still winners by self proclamation. We were already “The Big Four”. Whatever. Haha. The experience was worth it all. I never thought I could reach that far. I’m still proud of myself somehow. I can finally say I have already tried- no regrets at all. J

                        Being there and getting an audition number was already a blessing. To be chosen as the Mindanao representative for the PBB Teen Edition was already a bonus. To gain really good friends in a moment? WINNER. 

hell or what? NO. JUST A SCHOOL.

                     How do you define school when you're on the fringe of prolonged agonies- piled up projects, unending assignments, murdering exams- amd worse, you still can't get enough of the reason why you still have failing grades- yes. it is conclusively striking- you're becoming bitterER, and you define school as HELL!

                   

                    There are just times where you thought you've done all the ghadamned things you have to do. you thought you're gonna blow out of exhaustion and you just can't stop blaming school, teachers and so on for your unbeatable stress. You can't help but to curse the teachers behind their backs for laying all the miseries in the world at you.How could they do all these things to you- an innocent, paying minor. How in the world? And you ask for justice and concord but still they don't get it. They still inflict murdering, insurmountable schoolworks on you which seemd to be all IMMORTAL. There's no way you can't beat them.

                      But hey. Pause a second. Going back at the first place, think and try to remember, did you do your part on the first step? Did you take a step? Or did you just take all these things for granted and here you are right now- cramming to death. ? Regrets would come but they will all just pass away. Just think :]       

magic. :]

                    I can't help myself from falling inlove with the magic of the stars at night. Their twinkles allure my eyes and make me believe that there is something really very special- unnoticed- up there- and beneath them. Something out of the ordinary lies  and I just have to figure out what it is.. But I don't even know where to start.

                    The mystery is thrilling. The scene is stupendous. I can't help it. I just have to find out what lies beneath all these stars.. the world.
 

                    

all against the FURY OF NATURE.

                            Aren’t we supposed to enjoy fully our lives as teenagers? Aren’t we supposed to have all the fun we can get especially from the nature? How are we gonna do that nowadays? How – without worrying too much from the unpredictable fierce of nature?

                Darn. I really can’t help but think too much of what’s happening around. Earthquakes, Typhoons, Blizzards, Hail storms, Tsunamis- these are just some of how the nature claims back its glory or so. How are we gonna fight all these? All the worlds in a state of calamity (by self declaration) and I can’t help but think ‘are we still gonna reach the sun rise tomorrow?’

                I can’t help it. I am scared, I can’t hide it. Scared! What a litote! I just can’t help but feel so deprived of the things we can enjoy from the nature. I can’t help but feel deprived- by the nature. Classes are cancelled habitually, we can’t go out time and again because we’re still uncertain of our safety and our actions are so damn limited. Darn! Yesterday, we were enjoying the beach’s big waves, but now, we just can’t be confident enough. Our lives are still at stake. Often times, I would ask myself why are all these things happening? Can we put all the blame to the people? 

                The nature’s fury is inexorable. Worse, unpredictable. It is finally coming back to claim what needs to be claimed- LIVES. Now how are we going to fight a battle we can’t even see clearly? Are we ready?

                How are we going to fix all these? The nature’s vengeance has just begun but we’re already conclusively losing our strengths. Many have lost their shelters, their properties and despondently, many have paid the nature with their lives. The mayhem caused by the nature is hard to mend. We don’t even know where to start by now.

                I am trying really hard to grasp the understanding of what’s happening around. Actually, thinking about the things I would have done for fun as a youngster- none of them seem to matter anymore in this state of mishap. I couldn’t be more selfish.

                You? Don’t just read there and do nothing. Do something. We have to join the support system of the Earth. Never even fail to remember God in these times of predicaments. Help out. Pray. Pray harder. Act out.

Earthquake rocks- LITERALLY.

                 It's never really good to be really optimistic. As they say, "Thou shall not compians!" haha.
       
                 I thought today's gonna be okay already. I never thought of disasters coming again. But mom told us to just stay home in case of unpleasant happenings- well, I was thinking about my practice for our practicum in PE class with my classmates. I still went to school. 
                 If only I have listened to mom, I wouldn't be really traumatized like this now. We were already in the middle of our practice when suddenly- the ground shook so hard, things were falling, the walls and roofs of the Library lobby were already producing roaring sounds and my classmates were all running. I was panic-stricken again. I didn't know what to do exactly. I wasn't wearing my slippers on. Unfortunately, I was dumb-founded by the earthquake.
                 My classmates screamed like there's gotta be no tomorrow and they were running towards the exit. I was left. I was so stupid to not even move. Until fortunately, my cousin grabbed my hands and took me off like a heroine. Wow. I was still alive. Surprisingly, the really hard earthquake stopped when we reached the outside. I was still running after my breath. My knees were shaking like crazy and my heart was pounding so hard.
                I was still shocked by what happened last night. I haven't yet recovered from the trauma last night- and now, earthquake! For a moment I thought were all gonna die. If not now, soon. I knew it. I just knew it. 2012's gonna be the end of the world. I'm still crossing my fingers that this is some sort of a nightmare.. Just a nightmare. Were all gonna wake up.Soon. Im hoping against hope for that.

TSUNAMI ALERT SHAKES MATI'S SILENCE

               

                Matinians were trembled. The people were screaming and running like crazy. I had ran with the crowd still uncertain of what's going to happen next. Now I'm an evacuee. Last thing I can remember  is..                  

                I was surfing the net in one of the internet shops in our town when suddenly; dreading shouts filled the outside air, the door slammed open, a father came to get his son. “The seawater’s risen surprisingly! Go home, RIGHT NOW!!” .

                My sister grabbed my hands and led me to the entrance. But the people were already terrified that they filled the door altogether within a second and caused it to be blocked. I already forgot about all my things in my compartment in the internet shop. I was already horrified that I didn’t even mind the people, who were already clogging the passage way, I just wanted to get out.

                The funny part was, my sister grabbed my hand as I tried to get out and shouted, “Te, nakai nabilin 6 sa table! Kuhaon naq, Sayang! (Te, there’s P6.00 in your table, I’ll get it!). She sounded so stupid to still save the six-peso coin while our lives are already imperiled. (*Haha!)

                As we got out of the internet shop, I knew it right then and there- the end of the world is near. I was shocked. The people are running towards uncertain directions screaming for help, trying to spare their lives.  The seawater had gone beyond the seawalls. The water has already started to appear on the land, and the wind was blowing turbulently. The nature has gone mad. El Nino, the other day, a high magnitude earthquake, and now? – Well, let’s simply say, just a signal number two Tsunami alert.

                Who wouldn’t get really scared on that scenery? I was already panic stricken. I badly wanted to go home. Pedicabs and motorcycles would just run pass thru us. I was running like a crazy cat with nowhere to go with my younger sister. Funny part again-As I was running, coins dropped from my bag every now and then because I forgot to close my bag. My sister was still shouting about the coins falling from my bag. She was like, “Te! Nangatagak ang imung coins! Hulat sa! (Te! Your coins are falling! Wait!). without second thoughts, I grabbed her hand and shouted at her to forget about the coins. We are already running for our lives!

                We ran with the anxious and scared crowd with no clear directions at all. With our adrenaline rushing, we didn’t notice we had already run a distance of more or less, 500 meters within 30 seconds! Fortunately, we were able to persuade a pedicab driver to drive us home. Admittedly, I felt a twinge of guilt when he told us he was also in a hurry because his 7 years old son was left alone at home. While we were driving home, we could pass thru people, mostly families who carried really big baggages heading for evacuation centers. Wow. My first time to witness a fierce calamity in my quiet little town.

                 I was praying and calling God for divine interventions. I still have so many plans for my life. I was like losing my saliva and my heart was pounding like crazy. I felt like I was losing oxygen again. My knees are shaking like it had an earthquake under it with a magnitude of 8.8 and my heart seemed to jump out of my shirt. I was hardly catching my breath. I was really scared. This was for real now.

                When we got home, everything was already prepared. Our pertinent papers, some foods and clothes- everything. Mom was still wearing her pajamas and her face went really pale. Poor mom. She was all nervous. I couldn’t think of a right thing to do. I was really panic-stricken.

                The police patrol checked our shorelines after some hours and announced that we are already safe. It’s gonna be okay. But my heart wouldn’t just stop pounding like crazy. So here we are now, evacuees. Wow. So this is how it feels like. And I should tell you, it’s not a good feeling after all! I’m still scared, still uncertain of how tomorrow may come.

                 My town, Mati, has never been hit by the fierce of nature really hard. Thus, this made the people here to not really care about the Tsunami alerts, though they finally cared when the level alert was raised to signal number 2. God. Help us.

                Right now, I just wanna go home. Lesson learned about I and my sissy’s experience? –ALWAYS CLOSE YOUR BAG. Haha. I’m kidding right, well, here goes, Stay calm, Observe, Do actions.

bingka incorporated: Lit 2 - Video Satire

bingka incorporated: Lit 2 - Video Satire

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wDjKTo4Da6Y

14th of FEBRUARY [late post]

14^th of February; what’s the big deal with it?

                I woke up this morning with mom annoying me with her murdering hugs on bed. I stretched out my hand for my phone and when I looked at its screen, guess what? 118 messages received. What the?!

                What added to my frustration was that the 118 messages I received contained one thought, Valentine’s Day. Now I didn’t quite get that. Why are all the people so excited about it? What’s there to be excited for? Damn. I had disliked the idea of Christmas and New Year. Am I becoming a Grinch for the hearts’ day too?  Blimey! What’s going on with me?

                I so loved the idea of Valentine’s Day way back in high school. And I admit, the boys that I went crazy about were my impetus for this event of the year. I get so excited waiting for this day to come; I couldn’t sleep at night just thinking of it over and over again. I’d love to make everyone notice me on this day. I was so jejune. I would wear eye-catching clothes and alluring smiles. I would hang out with friends and date with guys. I have loved Valentine’s Day so much before.

                I used to be a very avid fan of the 14^th of February.  I believed I would get the chance to hook up with the guys I like on this day of the year. I couldn’t help but have faith that I would get the greatest love I was waiting for all of my life on this event. I was so crazy about Valentine’s Day. BEFORE.

                Okay, that was before. Last year, last last year; last last last year and so on. I can’t quite understand what’s happening with me at the moment. I can’t figure out the reason behind my peculiar behavior towards this day. I can’t even grasp reality that today is Valentine’s Day. Okay. Today is hearts’ day, but what’s the big deal about it?

                I don’t wanna ruin the fun and all. I just want to find the answer why I am I becoming a Grinch on the holidays of the people? Christmas, New Year, Valentine’s Day.. what more? I don’t wanna add more. Damn. Help.

7PM ; LAST TRIP

I am all lonely and blue

Thought I'd never see you..

Again or whatever

I thought I'm gonna wait forever

You told me none of your plans

you just came here and surprisingly grabbed my hands

what could I say?

I just want the moment to stop; stay.

Stay with me, never leave again

You're my happiness, you're my heaven

You know who really I am.

with you, I believed I can..

You keep me strong.

You make me feel I truly belong

I can't stand seeing you hurt.

It would only break my heart

We go out. We break free

with you, I'm just so happy

I couldn't help but wish..

That time would just stop; oh please!

We've got two hours left now..

And we're here staring at each other’s eyes..

No pretense; no lies

We both know I want you to stay longer..

But now here we are again

Seems like we're heavily laden

I can't take the sight of you leaving..

Now I just can't stop crying..

It's 7pm - it's gonna be the last trip..

It's time for you to go..

Give me a hug; hold me close momentarily..

Turn back now; you've got a bus to catch.

I try so hard not to let you see.

I try so hard to smile and look happy..

Deep within, I'm bleeding badly..

Deep within I'm crying like crazy..

This is just so obnoxious..

The rain is just so contagious..

Now that you're gone I can freely cry..

I couldn’t help but think I’m gonna die..

But I know I have to understand..

I'll just know, soon enough you'll return and hold my hand..

I'll be waiting patiently for you..

Wherever you go, take care - I LOVE YOU.

*yayo i'll be missing you :(

hiatus FACEBOOK.

    I'm going to give myself a brak from my cyberworld. It's gonna be a hiatus for my FACEBOOK, FRIENDSTER and MULTIPLY. I'm still deciding if I'm gonna consider blogging. Well, goodluck! It's just a little sacrifice :] I'm hoping against hope I can make it. I can and I will. Hiatus now! I'll be missing you :]

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real deal? WHAT??

I had this “Lovers’ Symposium” awhile ago in my school. Yeah, of course I learned a little, somehow. Their sermons are just repeated over and over in every “teen talk”. This is becoming so exasperating. Why is it that when the adults talk about love existing in the teenagers, they seem to really abhor the idea? I can’t get it. Didn’t they become teensters too?

                Our speaker stressed out that Love really has some reasons behind. He stated these reasons;

You have true love if: 

-          You care for your mate’s welfare and fulfillment as you do for your own.

-          You both have many values and ideas in common

-          You share similar goals and ideas

                I just want to clarify things out. Does love really go with these reasons? Do you really have to consider these reasons before you say you’re truly in love? I have read magazines and books and they tell me love is unconditional and unexplainable. How do they differ with the statements quantified by our speaker awhile ago? Do you really have to seek for these reasons before you proclaim you’re in love with someone? My question is – does love really go with these reasons- ONLY?

                I was quite disappointed by –let’s say the message of their talk. Mr. Speaker tells us to stop wasting our time with the affairs we have right now. Because we’re too young, we still don’t get things right, we’re prone to making mistakes, that entering into relationship means you really have to marry that person you’ve had an affair with in the future. the thing that I can never forget is, he told us, affairs right now’s just gonna be a waste of time, money, effort and most of all, emotions.

                I myself am into these affairs, but I don’t think it’s really a waste of time. I think I am just enjoying my teenage life. I know my limitations and I don’t neglect my studies. I chose to do the right as a teenager. Well you see, not all teensters with sweethearts are into PMS or any unlawful activities. I don’t it’s necessary to call it a waste of time, money, effort and emotions. It’s called- experience. Well, experience is the best teacher. We commit mistakes, we undergo failures but it’s never gonna be the end of the world. If we learn from our mistakes and use our experiences to correct things out well then, you’re living.

                It’s just a ‘live-a-life issue’. We live as teenagers and we act as a teenager too. How do they expect us? Live the life they lived centuries ago? We have our own ways of living. We love. We get hurt. We love again until the hurt stops, it’s life cycle. Love is a very inexorable thing. We can never stop that. We can never inflict whys and wherefores to it. 

              whatever they're trying to convey what the real meaning of love is, I APPARENTLY DON'T GET IT. I dont understand. shut me up or else..